What kind of tick is this
What Kind Of Fighter Are You?
What is your favorite color. naah that's so lame. Scenario: You are being bullied by your upper classmates. What will you do?
Phah, these amateurs need to be taught a lesson. *I'll just put a few spikes on this chair, some glue here. a little bit of gum in the hair. hmm, OH and take that rubber shot MOFO!*
Well, I'll just have to. "trip" them a little bit. Get them closer to the ground, become one with the concrete. I love nature ya know.
I'll just break this here pillar with my fist, that'll show 'em not to screw with me.
There is no need to be agitated, the matter is of minor proportions, and can be dealt easily with the right methods and a little chat with the principle.
Well, it's all about the center of mass. he's sitting over here, I push this chair leg over there.
I'll just unintentionally "open-up" my coat. it doesn't matter if they see the knife or the gun.
I'll just shoot them with paper during class. if you have the right technique and a good rubber band, launching one of those in the eye isn't very pleasant.
I think a short ninjato demonstration will get the job done.
These worms aren't even worth my time. They try anything smart I'll crack someone's scull with my pinkie, hope they survive.
I'll just pay them.
Scenario: You see some other guy being harassed by kids from another school. What will you do?
I'll just teach him a few street smarts. or just tell him to aim between the legs and then the eyes.
I might just arrange a falling accident.
I'll make them attack me, then I will block with such force that their bones break. That makiwara at home ain't just for show.
I'm fairly sure they have parents. I might spare 25 cents for a call.
I'll just handshake with them. Applying the right force with the right angle can dislocate someone's wrist without almost any effort.
What do you want me to do, huh? Call in an air strike or somethin'?
This might be an opportunity for some target practice, I wanna see how good this slingshot really is.
Good thing I brought a pair of nun chucks with me. this'll be quick.
Why should I give a damn? This guy is so weak he probably can't tie his own shoes. Let him suffer, might actually give some motivation to train and get stronger.
I'll just join them, it's his own problem that he can't deal with his own problems. Might as well rub it in.
Scenario: You are walking on the streets, when someone suddenly bumps into you. Outraged, the person pushes you back and starts taunting you. How will you respond?
Poke him in the eyes, hit in the gut, elbow to the spine and kick the living angels out of him when he's on the ground.
He's pushing with so much force it scares me. wouldn't want that force helping him rub the ground with his face.
One punch to the ribs should do, they hurt like an SOB and aren't lethal as long as they don't puncture the heart or the lungs. Gotta hold back a bit :/
I believe a saw a police officer over there, I think I'll head to that corner.
This guy can't even touch me. Too slow, mediocre technique. blah he's really bad. I'll feel guilty even if I block something.
I'll just grab whatever is close to me and use it as a weapon. That'll scare him.
What if I just pull out a gun?
Where did I put that knife again?
I'll just walk over him, even if he hits me in the face he'll just break his knuckles. Why are everybody so frekkin' weak?
Tell him to calm down and apologize.
Scenario: War is upon you, you have the option to choose what role will you play on the battlefield. What would you choose?
Tactician. My cunning fighting abilities will grant me with superior strategy experience, thus giving my troops the tactical advantage of me being their coordinator.
I don't like fighting, too much force, too much potential. I'll be a medic thank you.
I'll just be the guy who cracks skulls, breaks legs, severs arms and causes massive internal bleedings. What's the name? Yeah I'll take one please, oh and please give me the receipt.
War can be always resolved with words. I'll be the negotiator.
I'll be the artillery supervisor. One shell launched at a correct angle and proper force, plus the favor of the wind, can hit the enemy ammo supply. That would be the end of the war, and there would also be fireworks. Two rabbits with one nuke. ^^
Just give me a weapon and I'll win you the war in 20 minutes, even a stick will do. Hey you, officer guy, keep the fire burning I want my meat nice and hot when I come back, and make sure to get a movie and some beer for tonight.
I'll be the sniper support. gotta love performing long range brain surgeries.
Well, if there's a war, this means lots of people. sooo I'll be the guy with the dual dai-katana. Make sure to give me the connectable version. A bo dai-katana will be like a red whirlwind of death to them.
One sec. *Opens door, gets out. Screams and explosions in the distance. Comes back, closes door* Problem solved. damn it this wasn't even fun. And now I reek of blood. pheh, might go fight a bear, they are interesting to chase when they go berserk.
I'll be the double agent. So the outcome of the war will be up to me. I will decide who wins. depending on who pays. >:)
Scenario: You wake up from some noise, and later on discover that your house is being robbed. What will you do?
Fire up the gas and blow up the house. I'll tell the thugs did it, so the insurance should cover it all. Wanted to rearrange the hall anyway.
The thing with falling is that it's really hard to tell if it was on purpose or not. I think the floor is capable enough to crack a few skulls open. I'll just have the police clean it later on.
Punch their noses into their eye sockets. Give the surgeons a nightmare. >:)
Call the police. what else?
There's a very interesting fact that hitting someone's neck with proper technique, you can sever the brain from the spinal cord. I wonder if this is just a myth?
Grab the nearest item and beat the crap out of them.
YES, A TRESPASSER. uuh, I mean, oh no, a trespasser. I better use this 12 gauge, semi-automatic action shotgun with armor piercing rounds and a custom grenade launcher to defend myself.
Sai or knife, sai or knife. maybe a sickle? Naah, better get a tonfa. OOOOR I could try out my new bo!
How about, I get up, let them take a good look at me and get the hell out cuz I can't be bothered with weaklings.
I'll run away.
Scenario: You are sitting in a bar, when three bikers come up behind you and start harassing you. What's your course of action?
Get the ash from the ashtray throw it in their eyes, break a beer bottle. And threaten to kill. Always works.
I'm not alone here. gravity is my friend, if you get my point..
The bigger they are. the louder they break.
Call the guards.
I think it's time to create a new joint lock. one that involves three sets of limbs.
Hmmm. a hard choice. A grenade maybe?
I just happen to have three extra shuriken stars, how lucky of me.
Just open up the extensive baton and awaaay we go!
Fart and leave these losers to die. If that doesn't work, roundhouse kick and destroy the bar.
Buy them a beer, that should ease the tension off.
It appears the bikers were friends with the guards, they hold you responsible and want you out of the bar. They are five people, and you can tell that they have seen some fights. What will you do?
They might be tough, but a hit behind the ear is unforgivable.
Careful guys, there's glass on the floor.
The tougher they are,the better the. wait, WHAT? I already use that. blah, just break their legs, that should do the job.
It appears my plan backfired, I'll leave the bar, but I'm calling the manager!
Dislocated fingers are a nasty sight.
Ok, sooo, TWO GRENADES?
It doesn't matter what they've seen, I have 500 needle projectiles in my wrist band, I think I can spare five.
They want a taste of my baton as well? I think I'll have to start charging money for my services.
There is no bar since I destroyed it. So technically I already left. Who gives a damn if they are tough, I can one-shot all of them.
I'll just get out of there.
You go your own way home, but it appears that these guys from the bar just can't get enough of you, so they track you down and bring the whole gang with them. You are surrounded and are heavily outnumbered. How will you deal with the problem?
Everyone has a weak spot, it's just a matter of finding it.
I won't even have to lift a finger, they'll be "sky diving" all by themselves. well, with a little help from me. D
I'll smash their bikes into pieces, break their bones in half, shatter their organs to smithereens and make them regret angering me.
I'm sure this is some kind of a misunderstanding, I'll just have a chat with them and resolve the problem, violence is not the answer.
First I'll trip the guy to the left, then I'll grab another guy's wrist and forward it to a joint lock, I'll use him as a shield and retreat into a backstreet or something. Then it's easy since numbers won't matter there.
I see plenty of potential weapons around here. Some of them have weak structural integrity, but I think I'll manage.
I may be outnumbered, but I am NEVER outgunned.
I think I'll go Bruce Lee style here, nothing beats a dual pair of nun chucks.
PHAHAHAHAHAH, "Heavily Outnumbered", ARE YOU KIDDING ME. These worms need to get another 9000 men to even DREAM of getting close to me.
I'll try to run away, or I'll just pay them.
Suddenly the gang leader comes out, and tells you that if you beat him they will leave you alone for good. You notice that he has some scars and has a very tough muscle structure. He might be stronger then you, maybe even twice or thrice as strong. So what now?
There's plenty of dust on the ground, might be useful. I'll have to use a lot of feints to land vital hits.
No matter how tough he is, the ground is always tougher. I might arrange a date with it for him.
PHAH! TOUGH. Well, I hope I'm tougher than him, these dit da jow's really get the job done. It's all about BOOONE DENSITY!
Well, it looks like there's no way around it. I hate fighting, but since I have no choice now, I guess I'll just have to go for it. Simple attacks should do, I don't want to deal a whole lot of damage.
If he's so tough, this means that his flexibility isn't great. a shoulder, or an elbow lock should do the trick easily.
I'll grab this stainless steel pipe over here. I think this will leave a mark.
You know what they say. one shot, one kill. Or I might just shoot him in the leg. Depends on the mood. ^^
Good thing I brought my pocket bo. But if he breaks it, I still have two knives around here somewhere.
This might actually be fun. Stronger you say eh? Interesting.
I'll electrocute him and run for my life.
How do you deal with depression?
I AM depression.
A bit of meditation always gets the job done.
I'll go training. Maybe punch some rocks, break some trees, bend a few rails.
I seek harmony and peace, so I guess I'll spend a day in the woods. That should clear my mind.
I'll just play around with things.
Build a pyramid from cards, stack up a few chairs, balance on the roof. There's tons of stuff to do.
I'll just think up new weapons, or new ways of using regular items as weapons. or using weapons as regular items?
I'll shoot something. Cans of course, what did you think?
Practice a weapon performance.
I don't get depressed, only weaklings do.
I just wait it out, what else could I do?
Scenario: You are asked to chop up a big log. How will you do it?
Ask someone else to do it. I can't be bothered with stupid things such as this.
I don't like using my own energy to achieve a goal. I guess I'll just wait for it to rot. D
Imma smash it in pieces with a single low kick. I chopped logs like these when I was eight.
I don't like destroying a tree.
If I hit it at the right spot, it'll budge easily.
I'll just blow it up. That should cut it into good enough pieces. right?
Just get a heavy machine gun and blast the frekin log to oblivion. or at least until I'm outa bullets.
*Draws katans*. -wooosh-----SLASH!- *log falls down in tiny pieces.* That good enough?
I don't want to waste my time on a log when there are skulls to be smashed and bones to be shattered in a glorious river of blood going mad with bloodlust!
I will pay a guy to cut it with a chainsaw.
Scenario: You are trapped in a cave with a big boulder. How will you escape?
I'll just find another opening, there's ALWAYS an opening!
I'll manipulate that other boulder over there to smash the crap out of this boulder here, making a big mess of boulders and bouldering my way the boulder out of here. That enough boulders for you.
Pfft, so easy I don't even have to THINK! I'll use an iron palm slap. break it into symmetric shapes. OR, I'll just break a hole up so that I have oxygen. I kinda like it here.
I have a cell phone. don't think there's a problem.
The bigger they are, the easier they move. as long as you find the center of mass.
Good thing I brought my pocket (as in, portable :D) Rocket Launcher.
I'll order an air strike on the boulder. oh wait, that will result in more rubble right? Ok, so not an air strike, a BOMBING RUN! YEAHAHA THAT'LL DO THE TRICK :D:D. oh wait. nuke?
Got my titanium bo here. my hand's are itchin for a test run. ;)
I probably got trapped while I was asleep (yeah I like dark places. problem?) I'm tearing this place down and I'm gonna find who the hell had the guts to even TRY to trap me. then I will make him pay.
I'll scream my throat off and hope for someone passing by to help me. or the one who trapped me to have some mercy.
Scenario: You are eating at the best place with the best cooking and the best staff in the world. Suddenly people with masks invade the lobby and start shooting the roof. Everybody scream and lie down on the floor with their hands on the back of the head. Looks like these people are from a foreign country, and are scheming a political assassination from this building. Any plans?
I think half of these guys are from a rival gang. imma go call mah boys, this will be over in a minute. It's better be over before I finish my stake. or this place will be erased from the maps.
Ooh I had such a nice time, I'll just go to the toilet and escape from the vent shafts. Really not in a mood for a fight now.
I eat bullets for breakfast. I don't think it's worth my time babysitting a bunch of retards with toys.
There is no need for panic. I will negotiate with them and resolve the conflict peacefully. Words are a powerful weapon.
Well, everybody are on the floor, imma go join them and take a nap. God help whoever wakes me up though.
I'll throw my butter knife at the rope that holds that big lamp on the ceiling. These guys are right underneath it. X marks the spot. Time for the desert. *goes on eating*
Phahaha..SHOOTING THE CEILING. ARE YOU SMOKIN POT. This thing doesn't scare me, I took out a Scorpion class tank with a Glock 22! That's like taking out a battleship with Titanium-A hull coating with a spoon. Should I even say more? No? THEN GTFO NUBZ!
I gotta try a knife & fork Kali wield. this should be fun beyond good and evil. >>>>>:D
I'll finish my meal, help myself at the kitchen. And leave the building. This is so bellow my level. Anyone tries to stop me. heh. try to stop me.
PANIC. OMG I SHOULD RUN FOR MY LIFE!
Scenario: You are being mugged. A thug is holding a gun against your back, and violently asks for money. You can tell that he is on drugs. What will you do?
Are you kidding me? NO WAY IN HELL PUNK!
He's so anxious, I think a good nap will do him good.
I open stainless cans with my fingers, what makes you think I won't stick my hand into the back of your skull?
I'll give him the money, my life isn't worth a few hundred bucks.
I'll turn around fast, leaving his force to lead him forward, then I'll grab the gun and turn it the opposite way, effectively snapping the trigger finger. Problem solved.
He's not even holding this toy properly. What a waste.
Pointing a gun against me is like trying to drown a shark in a water tank.
I got a hidden knife on my heel, just "accidently" lift my foot aaand. wooops.
I can probably dodge the bullet. Plus, I can sense when he's going to shoot, feel the trigger sliding, and hear the bullet being launched, long before I even need to move.
I'll tell him that a rich guy is comming this way so that he leaves me alone.
You decided to report the incident to the authorities, what will you tell them?
To get this guy fixed. Drugs can kill ya. if they don't, I will.
Probably the street where it happened. After all I let this guy free. or scared him to death.
I would tell the police what he looked like. And warn them that he's armed and dangerous. I don't want anybody dying.
What the hell should I tell them? That this guy won't be able to hold anything with his hands for the rest of his life. At least he can't do drugs anymore.
I won't go to the authorities, they'll confiscate all my weapons. I got enough firepower to take out a country or supply a regular sized army. in ONE DAY!
I'll give them the gun, I don't need this piece of junk anyway.
I'll drag him to the police and throw him on the ground and tell them, "Here, he's your problem now."
The "authorities" won't have to know anything. Who cares what happened? They have a corpse to burry and that's that. Gotta love graveyards, gravediggers don't ask questions. they know better.
I'll sue the country for not being able to protect me.
Scenario: You are minding your own business when suddenly some guy jumps out of nowhere and challenges you. It's obvious to you that he's really inexperienced. What will you do?
To hell with it.
He'll fall right after he "jumps out of nowhere".
I'll show him that I can punch a hole through a tank's armor.
I'll ask him to find someone else.
I'll tie his arms. with themselves.
Just get a rock and hit him with it.
Threaten to shoot him.
Pull out a sword.
I have no time for cockroaches.
Hah, if he's weaker than me, THEN NO PROBLEM! I'll ducktape the window, get some cloth and break it. Then I'll use a magnet to open the door without tripping of the alarm. Then a mirror to evade the lasers. Then I'll. *goes on and on*
Scenario: You have to infiltrate a building and retrieve an important package. How will you achieve your objective?
Why should I tell you?
Push the guards off the roof. Dig a few traps so they fall in them, and get on with the mission.
I'll punch a hole in the wall and get the info. Simple.
I'll go undercover and get whatever I need. Nobody gets hurt, everyone is happy. well, except the enemy. D
Snapping a neck is just a matter of technique. lucky me.
Nuke the place.
I'll snipe everybody out with this custom sniper rifle. I even designed my own silencer. This thing leaves such a big hole; the mess left is just indescribable.
Slit some throats and get the job done.
I'll go through the main door. Whoever gets in my way, will either eat with a straw, or have dinner with the devil.
I'll bribe someone to get it for me.
Scenario: An MA World Champion hears of your abilities, and comes to your house wanting a fight. You refuse, but he starts taunting you. Any actions?
I can't be bothered. I don't fight for fun, I fight for business.
He's trying to interrupt my quality time. I don't know, I think I'll just ignore him, he'll probably stop in a while.
Who gives a damn about him? My training is far more important.
I'll ask him to leave.
I'll just go on with my card pyramid, this one will be the biggest EVER.
I'll cut the bread with a chainsaw, that should silence his petty voice up. What? I told you I was thinking of using weapons as regular items.
How about if I flash .49 magnum? Or better yet, how about TWO? OR. should I just launch a warning shot from my bazooka?
I'll go on with my training. hmm, how did this work again?
I'm not interested in sportsmen, playing by some rules is stupid. Going all out is what matters. I got no interest in that whimp.
Damn, this guy looks strong. I'll just ignore him, hope he gives up.
He doesn't seem to give up, he starts threatening you. So how about now?
I told you, I CAN'T BE BOTHERED!
Inner piece. inner piece. inn..inn. GAAAAAH THIS GUY IS FREKKIN ANOYING!
Phah, pathetic, THREATENING ME. How weak.
I'll ask him to leave, again.
This guy is starting to interfere with my concentration. Heh, I guess I'll take it as an opportunity to improve my skills.
I'll tell him that I can kill a man with a carrot. I think it's more appropriate for me to threaten him. I'm not nice when I threaten people.
I'll tell him that I can hit a bullet, with a smaller bullet, from 10 km away, while wearinga a blindfold, riding a wild horse, jumping between stones.
I just finished cleaning my ninjaken collection, I don't want to get them dirty. again.
This idiot is really starting to get on my nerves.
I'll call the police just in case.
Finally, outraged from the fact that you are ignoring him, he leaps at you and starts a fight. This time it's inevitable,how will you deal with him?
He's used to ring fights with rules, he can't counter feints and eye gauges. I'll destroy him.
I'll give him a good throw. maybe somewhere in the nettles. That should cool him off.
I'll break every bone in his body. He'll be surprised how bad it feels to have over 200 fractures.
I'll block until he realizes that he can't beat me.
NOO..my pyramid. MY PYRAMIIID! 4 days, 76 decks, 3952 cards. GRAAAAAAAAAA. I will twist his joints until he'll have walk on his hands! HE WILL PAAAAY!
I'm gonna shut his yap with a bowling ball to the face!
Ok that's it! *Shoot him in the shin, then the knee, then the other knee, then the elbow, then the other shin, then the ankle, then the shoulder, then the other elbow, then thigh joint, then the other shoulder, then the other anckle, then. etc*
I'll make sure he never survives our little chat.
This fool will witness what happens when you TICK. ME. OFF!
Good thing I called the police.Source: www.theotaku.com